I am sure I should get on here and tell everyone what a wonderful Thanksgiving our family had but sadly that just wasn't the case.
Zack and I were fighting,
I was bitchy,
Grayson got up at 4 so he was a crabby boy,
and Jesse got to be in the middle of the whole ball of fun. Yeah!
Add to it all that this is the first holiday without out sweet baby Jonathan. I can't help but think that I should still be pregnant. I should be enjoying the day and rubbing my belly. Instead of thinking about the child I have lost and how many holidays I will have to go through,
in the rest of my life, without him.
So unfortunately, no I did not enjoy this holiday and I am doubtful I will enjoy the next one. I just wish I could curl up in my bed and not get out of it.
I just want the holidays to go away.
Here is a few pics of us faking it:
Zack and I were fighting,
I was bitchy,
Grayson got up at 4 so he was a crabby boy,
and Jesse got to be in the middle of the whole ball of fun. Yeah!
Add to it all that this is the first holiday without out sweet baby Jonathan. I can't help but think that I should still be pregnant. I should be enjoying the day and rubbing my belly. Instead of thinking about the child I have lost and how many holidays I will have to go through,
in the rest of my life, without him.
So unfortunately, no I did not enjoy this holiday and I am doubtful I will enjoy the next one. I just wish I could curl up in my bed and not get out of it.
I just want the holidays to go away.
Here is a few pics of us faking it:
2 comments:
Jaimey,
Don't fret about 'faking it' as you have a perfect right to feel all of your feelings. It is still so fresh. Know that it is a process and will take 'time' however much you need. I am very proud of you, my girl, and want you to be patient with you! Take good care, your loving, caring way will keep Jonathan in your heart always. Love, Janet
That is a beautiful picture of you and Grayson. It's too late to wish a Happy one but know that we love you.
Troy and Janna
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