Seriously, I have the WORST computer "luck/ karma/ juju" or whatever. I have been MIA still because we still have not come up with the funds to buy another laptop. And as everyone knows, I seem to kill them. The dinosaur (9 yr old desktop) hates me and refuses to load anything in less than 15 minutes so its more frustration then its worth. Who has that kind of time?!
So I have been using Zack's work pc. Until now. Apparently, they don't want me to anymore. I tried to upload some pics just now and got a block message. Le sigh. I guess its back to the drawing board. Maybe we'll win the lottery. Or Powerball. Guess I should go play...
The Chronicles of a Wife, Mom of 4 boys and Type 1 diabetes warrior.
Showing posts with label grumpy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grumpy. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Grumpy
GRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrumpy. That is what I am this afternoon. I get that it is probably par for the course but I am just angry today. I am so tired of pretending I am not pregnant in public so people won't ask me or congratulate me. I want to be excited about my baby, I want to be happy that I am pregnant. And granted I do cherish every second we have him but sometimes its just too much to think about.
I just spent two hours at the park with some friends and some acquaintances. The friends know what is going on. The rest don't. So there I sit in a tight top and warm up pants cause when I left I didn't feel like changing into something else that covered better. Lately I go out in public with a big puffy vest on so that you can't see what is under it for sure. So there I sit, slumped over so it just looks like I am fat. I don't want to tell them I am pregnant. I don't want to tell them he will die. I don't want more well wishes. I just want my baby!
The worst I think is the things people say when they don't know what to say but feel compelled to say something anyway. For the record- Say you are sorry and leave it at that. Anything more and you are going to put your foot in your mouth. People mean well they really do so I don't hold a grudge and I have no hard feelings if you are reading this and you are one of the people who said these things, but for the love of Pete! PLEASE don't tell me that God works miracles and just to hope. Um ya, thanks my baby is a miracle but no he is not going to miraculously grow a brain at 6 months gestation and be fine. That is just not going to happen. Yes I am sure he of his diagnosis. I would not take it lying down. And yes, I would get a second opinion if I was unsure. We are not. We have seen 3D ultrasounds, he has no brain. Simple as that and its obvious. Unfortunately, anencephalic babies usually don't form a skull either and sadly he didn't.
I don't mean to be harsh, ungrateful or anything else. I am just angry and grumpy. Off to eat worms.
I just spent two hours at the park with some friends and some acquaintances. The friends know what is going on. The rest don't. So there I sit in a tight top and warm up pants cause when I left I didn't feel like changing into something else that covered better. Lately I go out in public with a big puffy vest on so that you can't see what is under it for sure. So there I sit, slumped over so it just looks like I am fat. I don't want to tell them I am pregnant. I don't want to tell them he will die. I don't want more well wishes. I just want my baby!
The worst I think is the things people say when they don't know what to say but feel compelled to say something anyway. For the record- Say you are sorry and leave it at that. Anything more and you are going to put your foot in your mouth. People mean well they really do so I don't hold a grudge and I have no hard feelings if you are reading this and you are one of the people who said these things, but for the love of Pete! PLEASE don't tell me that God works miracles and just to hope. Um ya, thanks my baby is a miracle but no he is not going to miraculously grow a brain at 6 months gestation and be fine. That is just not going to happen. Yes I am sure he of his diagnosis. I would not take it lying down. And yes, I would get a second opinion if I was unsure. We are not. We have seen 3D ultrasounds, he has no brain. Simple as that and its obvious. Unfortunately, anencephalic babies usually don't form a skull either and sadly he didn't.
I don't mean to be harsh, ungrateful or anything else. I am just angry and grumpy. Off to eat worms.
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